Find help

If you're experiencing abuse and need help now, one place to start is the national domestic violence hotline.
Call 800-799-7233 (TTY 800-787-3224), text "START" to 88788, or visit www.thehotline.org

Domestic violence is
Couple holding hands

Healing can happen on many levels

Domestic violence is a personal experience, but its root causes go far beyond any individual person—and the opportunities to promote healing aren’t limited just to individuals, either.

Society can develop alternatives to criminal justice

Build healing into accountability
A middle aged asian man puts his arm around another middle aged asian man, both seen from behind looking out a window.A middle aged asian man puts his arm around another middle aged asian man, both seen from behind looking out a window.

We all benefit when we hold harm-doers accountable AND help them to heal.

Restorative justice is a way to repair harm without involving the criminal legal system. Most Californians support the idea of using restorative justice as a path to healing from domestic violence, because in other crimes, it gets results:

Repeat offenses go down
Restorative justice
18%
Traditional criminal justice
27%
Survivors are more satisfied
Restorative justice
79%
Traditional criminal justice
57%
Learn about restorative justice

Learn about restorative justice

Visit these organizations to learn more about restorative justice approaches to domestic violence.

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70%
of people who cause harm through domestic violence have also experienced it themselves, as survivors or witnesses.

Communities can use their  knowledge

Value community solutions

Domestic violence affects every community in California—differently

Our cultural beliefs and traditions shape how domestic violence shows up in our communities, and domestic violence has different impacts depending on a community's access to resources. When it comes to healing from domestic violence, one size does not fit all. We can and should create solutions that respect deep cultural knowledge.

Tell us how your community heals

Tell us how your community heals

How do problems like domestic violence get solved in your community?

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Sooner or later, we all discover that kindness is the only strength there is.
-Father Gregory Boyle,  Founder of Homeboy Industries

Governments can adopt holistic approaches

Help the whole person
Two older white men in suits in a government hearing room, seen from behindTwo older white men in suits in a government hearing room, seen from behind

Systems work better when they work together

None of us live single-issue lives, so we need to move away from single-issue services. To be most effective, governments need to design systems that help the whole person and the whole family. Instead, many of our current systems—for housing, health, financial security, and domestic violence—are set up in silos, and rarely coordinate well. Our systems need to be interconnected, like real life.

Learn about holistic approaches

Learn about holistic approaches

Visit these organizations to learn more about the work that is happening to encourage governments and other systems to work more holistically and effectively.

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Families can build healthier relationships

Strengthen connections
A young Latinx child smiling in the foreground, with her two mothers in the background smiling and looking at herA young Latinx child smiling in the foreground, with her two mothers in the background smiling and looking at her

What elements make relationships healthier?

Most of us never get a class on what it means to be a good partner, parent or friend, but being in a relationship is a skill we all can learn.

Open sharing and genuine listening between all people in the relationship (even in conflict)

Trust is a key part of healthy relationships, and honesty (with healthy boundaries and some privacy) builds trust.

Affection can take many forms. However it is expressed, knowing the other person in the relationship cares deeply builds strong bonds.

Mutual respect is present when both people feel that who they are, what they think, and what they need is heard and valued.

Reflect on your relationships

Reflect on your relationships

What aspects of your relationships are you most proud of? It’s good to talk to your loved ones about what makes you feel happy and supported in your relationships, and what things you’d like to work on.

If you’re concerned that your relationship may be impacted by domestic violence, there are resources to help. One place to start:

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Healing is a path to prevention

Every time a survivor, family member and harm-doer is able to heal, it stops a cycle of violence. The impact these cycle-breakers have on the world ripples outwards—healing for one generation is prevention for the next.

Continue reading
An aerial view of a neighborhood in a California city.Overhead picture of neighborhood
A young black father holding his happy toddler in his arms, while the young black mother hugs the father and from behind and smilesA young black father holding his happy toddler in his arms, while the young black mother hugs the father and from behind and smiles